I LOVE YOU JC (part 2)

Lie back, daughter, let your head
be tipped back in the cup of my hand.
Gently, and I will hold you.
Spread your arms wide, lie out on the stream
and look high at the gulls.
A dead-man’s float is face down.
You will dive
and swim soon enough where this tidewater
ebbs to the sea. Daughter, believe
me, when you tire on the long thrash
to your island, lie up, and survive.
As you float now, where I held you
and let go, remember when fear
cramps your heart what I told you:
Lie gently and wide to the light-year
stars, lie back, and the sea will hold you.

(First Lesson, Phillip Booth)


Dear JC,
As a man who is well-acquainted with sea
I learn many things from a deep, vast ocean..
It’s like life in analogy..
Tide, storm, sunshine…
Sorrows, joys, and even humors…
Every single thing has its own wisdom inside…
Now I’m writing to You…
telling how You create me as a strong sailor through rough wind and abating storm..

Ha…ha…ha…
Ooops, I’m sorry JC, I was laughing, but I was not laughing at You.
It’s just…uhm… sometimes I think You’ve got good sense of humor.
Even in bad circumstances experienced by Your sons.
Like what I have experienced so far.
JC, I know You have a good ability in putting lessons about life in any kinds of situation.
Laughs and tears are provided to enrich human’s life perspectives.
All are means of showing Your caress….
Now, I’m facing hardship in life, but thanks JC I still can laugh because….
I know You always be with me…
Never let me alone in any circumstances….
I remember…six years ago I was through a circumstance by which I changed my point of view.
Since then I know the One to whom I trust and ask for strength whenever I’m weak.
You share Your optimism to see problems as challenges in life.
“So, with You I can do a lot of things.” (Phil 4:13)

Dear JC,
Let me trace back to what happened to my family several years ago.
It was about how my family got the emotional bound between the members.
It was my older brother’s girlfriend You used to show that…
love between family members is precious thing in life…
My brother loved her with all his heart, even he helped her financial problem by giving her money to pay her college–fee and also gave her family capital to set their shop..
But what had she done to him?
She loved another man when my brother was on duty on the ship.
How could she do that, JC?
It was a long relationship to throw away…
But he always trusts in You and believes that everything will be ok if he leaves everything on Your hands….

Dear JC,
A couple of years later, it happened also to me…
I broke my 10–years relationship with a girl I loved..
However, I consider it as something worth learning.
It really means a thing for me..
Love, laughs, tears, caress….are things which do not deserve to be thrown away..

Ha..ha..ha..anytime I remember that I question myself…
……why should I cry out loud……
……why should I loose weight……
……why should I loose my appetite……

Dear JC,
I learn from those bad circumstances that
Since then each member of my family tries to reach each other's hands
to strengthen those who are weak….
You make my family is closer to each other…
Pray together in Your Almighty name…
Share laughs and tears…
Although distance does us apart…
I still remember what is said by my mother:
If there were a writer whose will to write our stories, there would have been a good family drama to watch on TV!
Now on, from what we experienced in the past, we can help others whose the same problems..
Thanks JC for the opportunity to learn the cruel side of life so that we can offer hands to help others…

Dear JC,
Now, I come across with another bad circumstance…
On July 17th I should have been on the ship doing my job…
seeing Europe and Latin America as I always dream about…
But suddenly………………………………………………………………………………
My name disappeared from the list of crews who will join the sail.
Emails have been sent to the Headquarter, but I’ve got no certain answer for it.
Shocked….confused……but I wonder why I just laugh at it.
Though I realize that I’ve been five months on vacation
and slowly I’m broke for there’s no job to do!
I messaged my cell leader, my best friends, and also my prayer troops,
telling them what happens to me…
And I’ve got the same reply:
..maybe this is the time God lets you find your soul mate before sailing……
Ha…ha…ha…this is what I love about You JC…
Behind all sorrows, there must be something given as reward.
You never let us down….
“There which eye has not seen and ear has not heard, and which have not entered the heart of man, all of God has prepared for those who love Him.”

(1 Corinthians 2:9)

Dear JC,
I remember when I let my beloved one go a few years ago…
You show me this precious Scripture:
“My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord, nor faint when you are reproved by Him; for those whom the Lord loves He disciplines, and He scourges every son whom He receives.” (Hebrew 12:5-6)

Is this what You want me to learn, again?
You disciple me, You make me a man, a grown-up man..
Not a spoiled boy who always gets what he wants and cries if he doesn’t get what he wants…
Is this the way You get me into my manhood?
Although the bad circumstances sometimes made me cry, made me loose my mind but….
As long as I’m with You, I will be strong…
Let them challenge me!
I’m not afraid anymore because I know You always be at my side…

Dear JC,
Teach me how to cope hardships in life…
Mould me to the shape that You want me to be…
Give me strength….
Give me Your eternal Light….
Hold me tight…
Let this humble man face his life challenges…
Conquer life by the power from You, Lord…
not from my own might I can bear the burdens…
Let Your wills done!


From the deepest love to You, my JC
stefanusfajar

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Deliverance from the Death

I went to complete my administration terms in my campus for the graduation ceremony. Dini my friend, who lives in the same way home with me asked for a ride home. I was in hurry to go home but she insisted eventhough I didn’t have one helmet spare. There’s no sign that something bad was going to happen in that morning, 2001 a week after I finished my thesis test. Thanks God, I could not imagine if this experience happened before the test.

It took only 15 minutes to Dini’s home by motorbike somehow. Before we arrived, around 20 meter away home I turned the right sign-lamp on and I took a look at my right rearview mirror…it seemed okay to cross the street. The cars behind us even slowed their ride down to give space to cross. I was right on the middle of the street, when suddenly a truck in high speed came across. Franticly I tried to avoid it, but there was no time...O God, please help...Dini... BOOM! Everything became dark...

I opened my eyes, I heard voices...everything was blur...I was dazed from the accident…tried to wake up and searched for my friend Dini. O God, she was there…by the street’s edge. People clustered around her. I came and shook her up…Dini, are you alright? Dini, please wake up…but she was unconscious…her head was wounded and bleeding…O God…what should I do? “Come on, hurry up…bring her to the hospital” the crowd shouted. Then some men stopped a car and lifted her inside. The car brought us to the nearest hospital; Thanks God it’s only five minutes away…

While Dini was being taken care in ICU, I went to complete the papers for the administration and tried to contact Dini’s parents and mine. God please let Dini’s parents know about this accident…it was my prayer when I couldn’t contact them. Suddenly they showed up with tensed expression…Lord, I’m worry about Dini…help me to explain to Dini’s parents…eventhough it was small wounded but every time she’s awake, she’s vomiting and fainted again…please Lord…
”I’m sorry, I couldn’t control it…we’re just about to cross the highway, suddenly without any sign a truck…”, “It’s okay…let’s just pray that Dini is okay” Dini’s parents cut my explanation. They tried to calm their voices, but their worry face obviously seen. My parents came abruptly. “Are you okay Rien?” Suddenly I lost my mind, so dizzy and I felt weak…I walked wobbly into the ICU. “Nurse, can I get medicine…” the nurse then laid me on the bed…but I started vomiting…so dizzy…weak…I had to stay on the bad a whole week long, but Dini…she was coma for a week and almost a month she didn’t remember anyone even worst…she lost her sense of smell!.

In 2005, Dini and I were together in a boarding house. We were joking with friends in that afternoon, playing around…”Who’s farting?! Gosh…it’s so smell!” Dini shouted. “Haaah? Dini…you can smell again…!” I was completely stupefied by what has happened. He made miracle to Dini, her sense of smell came back. I recalled that bad day. Many witnesses who saw that terrible accident said that we were hit by speeding truck, we collided badly on the truck’s nose…my head broke the rearview, and Dini’s head without helmet hit the asphalt straightaway. But amazingly, the crowd said…it’s like someone had laid me down safely with helmet still on my head. What a wonderful Lord You are! You saved and kept us away from any worst injured. Most amazingly, it didn’t take a long time for the healing. Praise the Lord!

composed by: Riena M Kusuma N, SH

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I LOVE YOU JC

Dear JC,
Today I was thinking about what I had been through in these 31 years.
July 11, 31 years ago, You let me see the world for the very first time…
You also gave me the most wonderful present in my life, a twin! It’s a rare gift, right?
Not everyone gets as precious present as what I got from You.
So, it’s the way You show me Your gracious love.
I got along with wonderful childhood when my family and I lived in Jayapura.
Although I don’t remember what I experienced when I was there, but from the pictures I know that we were so happy when we had a vacation with the whole family on a beach there.

Dear JC,
You really know that when I was a small kid I could not stand doing things which were considered dangerous.
Do You remember JC, where I got the scar on my forehead?
The scar is like that on Harry Potter’s forehead.
One day, when I was a toddler I fell down on a rocky street when I was running after my uncle who was on his scooter.
I do really know if You had not caught held my hand I would have been more badly injured. Thanks for the scar which always reminds me of that unforgettable moment.

Dear JC,
When I was 5 years old, You sent Your angels to guard my family to move from Papua to Solo, a small town in which I spent my youth.
You put Your hand on my mother’s and my aunt’s hearts to calm them down when I ran from one seat to other seats when we were flying high above. I kept making them worried of my running here and there, he…he…
JC, do You remember my neighbor, Miss Nining?
Was I so cute so that she always lingered around me?
Do You also remember that I was about to loose my right ear because of her?
One afternoon, I was too excited riding my little bicycle without having an additional wheel.
However, she kept worrying on the way I rode my bicycle. She ran after me to guard me so that I wouldn’t fall down from the bicycle.
Unfortunately, this frightened me a lot because I was still nervous.
I tried hard not to hit her, but …….the accident happened!
When I was trying to avoid her I hit the freshly-cut bamboo fence and it cut my right ear.
AAAARRRRRGGGGHHHH, JC it hurt me…I couldn’t help seeing the running blood.
I left my bicycle and run to my mom at home. She banded the wounded ear.
Do You still remember what I did after that JC?
I was back to my little bicycle and played around…he…he…what a kid!
Thanks JC for Your love through my mother’s hands…

Dear JC,
You taught me many other lessons in my elementary school time.
I remember You had Your angel catch me from another accident.
I fell down on a street with slippery asphalt scattered around when I was chasing my friends.
At that time, I knew that You sent Your angel through my teacher’s hand, Mr. Roesdianto.
He helped me to stand up and banded my injured chin.
JC, You also granted my twin brother and me to have chance to win a traditional dance competition in a province level, but of course it required night and day labor.
I know JC, You had given us the smallest amount of Your strength to put forth our best effort to be the winner. What a Gracious Lord! Thank You….

Dear JC…
I still remember, at the same time 19 years ago when I was in the 6th grade in elementary school, my twin and I asked our mother to make traditional cakes to be brought to school to celebrate our birthday. She made lots of lontong and pastels for all our teachers and classmates. I was worrying all the time to wait for the celebration, so that I couldn’t concentrate on the lessons given by the teachers. Was everything under control? Was everything well-prepared? Would there be anything bad happen? Such questions occupied my mind.
Finally, the breaking time came!
Mr. Tukimin, our teacher, gave us an announcement that there would be an immunization program for the 6th grade students. The program would be carried out right away.
Oh, we were all surprised because we had such a program previously. Some of the students started to worry…especially those who were afraid of being injected.
Voila, suddenly Mr. Tukimin brought in a basket full of food! Hahaha….it’s a gorgeous time I’ll never forget! Thanks JC for Your sense of humor!

Dear JC,
It was my time in junior high.
Do You still remember when You saved me from the other accident?
My school was quite far from home; therefore, my parents bought me a bicycle.
One morning, I was in hurry to go to school and the traffic was terribly crowded.
On a T-junction, I made a sudden turn after passing a motorcycle……aaaand…BOOM!
The motor cycle hit me. I fell down on the street with my bicycle was over me.
The man with his wife and child on the motorcycle were ok, but he got mad at me.
He shouted at me with swearing words! He blamed me for the accident.
JC, I know that again Your hand fell over his wife’s heart.
She calmed her husband down and asked him to continue their ride.
I didn’t get bad injures. But it was scaring experience somehow.
Thanks Lord for Your saving me again that time…

Dear JC,
The time of my manhood was putting forth its buds.
It was time when I was in the 2nd grade of senior high.
I got involved in a Sunday School activities to serve You.
Lord, You gave a chance to get acquainted with a beautiful girl with whom I shared my laugh and tears.
She was so gorgeous! She sparked my world!
Together, we served You, prayed in Your name.
We supported each other and prayed for our families together.
But, it only lasted in 10 years. We decided to have our own way.
JC, although it hurt me a lot, it gave me insights about woman, life, love, and caress.
JC, I believe in Your plan of having me in Your perfect time to unite me with my soul mate in a holly marriage.
I do really trust in Your beautiful blue print of man’s drama!

Dear JC,
Now I realize how a Gracious Lord You are to me!
I cannot depict Your Love to me into a single word.
Your eternal Blessing, Your Caress, Your protection, Your Guidance, Your miracles.
You touche me, You forgive my sins, You grant me to be Your son.
You strengthen me whenever I’m weak, You comfort me,
You show me the way whenever I get lost
You always grant me miracles in life while I never ask You any of them….

Dear JC,
I am ashamed of what I have done to You!
I’ve promised to be with You all the time, but many times I forget You.
Lord, I’ve hurt You….
You have granted me with a beautiful name, Stefanus, which means a man who is being crowned, a man who is full of the Holly Spirit and strong faith…but who am I?
I’m nothing but a dust, a man who often forgets about You.
Again, You never let me far from You by sending me friends who always reminds me of Your eternal Love and Caress.

Dear JC,
I have nothing to fulfill my promise.
I can give nothing in return of Your gracious Love.
But, please don’t let me far from Your warm Light or take the Holly Spirit from my soul…
I need You...
I can’t live without You…

I thank Thee for all You have done to me...
Lift me up from the darkness…
You never let me deserted…
You always be with me whenever I need You…
You have already arranged beautiful plan for my future…
You grant me with blessing and miracles...
Lord, let me be like You...
You’re truly awesome!
In Your hands, I surrender my life…

July 11th, 2007
From the bottom of my heart.
For You, my beloved JC.

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He cares...

When we walk with God everyday, He surely doesn’t mind with our ordinary problems of life no matter how simple it is.


Mary has three little daughters, and would be baby is going to be born. She lives with her husband and two housekeepers in a rent house. Her husband is a physician who’s taking his master degree right now; he is very busy with his studies and hospital tasks. He often goes home late because his job loads. Mary works as a government employee. Her office is about five six kilometers away from her rent house. In her 7 months pregnancy, she could not take a bus to go to her office; it forces her to go by motorbike instead. With 4 years old, 4 years old and 1 year old daughters, she barely takes a good rest everyday. She has to feed, cook and lots of social activities. It made her aunty, Ruth, came to help her for keeping her daughters.

One day, Mary had a social event to attend. She had to dress up well for it. She usually wears earrings for a special occasion. But, after looked for them many times, she still could not find them. I remember to put them here, in this box where they usually stay. I could ask somebody…but it might offend them, what should I do? Then she phoned her father who lived nearby for help. “All right, don’t panic…I’ll pray for you” John answered to Mary’s franticly called. Mary continued to search for the earrings with Ruth’s help. They both opened the cupboards, opened the make up drawers, but they could not find them. Huuuh I could not go without them, Mary sighed.

Hey...are these the earrings? Ruth shouted when she saw a glimpse under the bed sheet. Mary was very happy they finally found them. But didn’t we already upside down the bed sheet? Didn’t we search…Mary confused how that could be happened, but John knew what was happened after Mary told him about her experience. He was sure that God helped her to find them.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

“Where’s the key…I put it on the table over here!” Steve shouted while searching. “I have to go now; I don’t want to be late”. He was just arrived home from his senior high school and had to go back to change his shirt for a course session this afternoon. “Any body saw it?” Steve was looking everywhere. He searched to where he was, in the garage, bathroom, kitchen, his room…in the living room, but nothing was found. O come on…I need it now, please God…He sat with his back lean on the sofa. God, I’m tired…but I have to go to English course now…he murmured and started to fall asleep…

Cling…he heard something fell down on the floor. He caught a glimpse of light at his side eye. He woke up and saw a key on the floor not far from his position. Hah... how could it be…His eyes searched for around, but no body was there with him. His mother was in the kitchen busy for cooking; his brothers were still busy with their activities outside. So, there was no chance somebody threw the key to him. He looked up…God, he…he…he…You’re so funny…but, great thanks for Your help.

We usually ask God’s helping in certain-big problems. We pray or even are fasting to get the answers. When we relief from the struggling and receive the answers we don’t forget to thank God, but for the ordinary problems…do we usually thank God for His care?

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Re: upsize where it matters

Ever wish for a mighty manhood so strong that you can take on all the women in the world?

http://www.welltuck.com/

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God is my Shepherd and my Hope (part 3)

In my prayers, I asked the best job from God, working in Jakarta…stay in a brand new location started the new life, away from my passed darkness.
Many tests I experienced, but none gave good result…even though until the last step, still zero…They gave many reasons, from the look and physical that’s not matched with what they asked for…gosh…how can they judge a book by its cover, didn’t they already read my CV? Often they said, they were looking for the experienced graduate law faculty student…how could I have experience if they don’t give me chances? And if there’re a company hired me, they could not give balance in return…overtimes because of the work loads with limited times…it ate me much, I could not stand anymore! It’s heavy struggling for me, tested my faith…how big I trusted and relied my hope on Him, because like or not, I still remembered Yudha’s cursed on me…

In the 5th year after my graduation, I felt emptiness. I could not think straight anymore. I could not give the best to my parents as the oldest children, I was afraid to burden them forever, I felt nothing…I was exhausted…God what do you want from me? Please tell me…I don’t want to make another mistake anymore, don’t let my pass hold me back to walk ahead with You. I give up my future to You, I want to fulfill Your will for me…please don’t let this burden drags me away from Your sight, give me strength Lord…

In early 2006, God had answered my prayers. I got information that the Transportation Department needed for civil servants 2005 formation. But I was afraid, could I pass this time? I didn’t study for a long time, many good competitors would be there, it downed me…
Fortunately My parents, my whole families gave their support…so I made up my mind and sent my application, with my Law degree background and Crime Law majority.

When the 1st step result being announced, the level for whoever passed the administration terms, I urged to check my name on the Transportation Department website. On the Crime Law field, I checked them out one by one started with R as my alphabetical name, but nothing...I rechecked again slower, but still none! Reluctantly, I rechecked names by names started with A through Z, but still my name was not there!

Upsad, felt useless...but before I clicked the log out button, a calm voice whispered to my heart...why don’t you read one by one, field by field? Hey, why not...nothing to loose right? I can check also if my friends pass this administration terms. Suddenly, I saw a home address written. Huh...? Isn’t it my address...how...how it can be? And this is my name next to it! Praise Lord! It’s really astonishing, my name written in the Civil Law formation...but didn’t I apply for the Crime Law?

Weeks later, the time for the test came. I surrendered all to the Lord...and I set my mind up then went to Jakarta. But, a few hours before the test, something bothered me...shocked me badly! Lord, what is this? I just came back to You, but this one wants to hold me back! I can not believe this, he spoke like that to me...we’re so close, same feeling...how could he? But why now? Why not in the past few years ago when I left him for Yudha? Why now when I’m going to take the test tomorrow...it’s hurt...grudge and hatred...I won’t forgive him, ever! I cried...cried..confused...I didn’t know what to do...are there any chances for me to stand on my own feet? Am I not deserve happiness? It blew me down! I just wanted to go home, gave up...but if I gave up, I’d fail! Thanks God, He sent His son – thanks Mr. Anton – you cooled me down “Forgiving is not merely about feeling nor dignity, but decision. Can we love him just like Jesus does to us? Remind this, there is always beautiful rainbow after the rain and storm stop” and prayed for me…In the morning, I took the test…I relied on Him for all the process although as human being it’s not easy, could I pass these all? But I just looked up to the Lord…

Numbers by numbers of the tests went by…but every time this hatred came, I called Him. Lord was so good, He gave me wisdom to finish the tests that I’d never been learnt before, and I didn’t know at all about the transportation things. Even, so far when I did the logical test I took a lot of time to finish it, but this time…it’s so quick! I knew it’s because of Him…
But it didn’t stop yet; weeks later I got called to do the 3rd test, the psychological test and interview. Worries attacked me…could I do these tests? I don’t know all about transportation field and the Civil Law is not my majority. Minutes before the tests, I was so nervous. There’s somebody else, a Christian as well, would do the tests after me. We had discussion about the tests, and we played what if question. If the question like this then the answer should be like this…My turn for the test came. In the room, there’re three people inside. Two persons were the High Rank from the department, and the other one was the Psychologist. Again, miracle happened! The questions were just like the what if questions! All the questions were answered, and the tests were so relax, so enjoying. What a marvelous Lord! I realized then that He sent someone to prepare the answers by playing the what if questions. My family and I gave the result to God, let His will be done. If this one is Your plan, there’s nothing impossible for You Lord. And whatever the result would be, I still thank Thee. I’m holding on Your promises…my future is in Your hands.

Praise the Lord! Hallelujah…He answered our prayers. I was in! He put me in this job! But what happened to my competitor friend? She had a capability more than me and a lot of experiences that fits to this job. Thanks friend, for what you’d done for me…Thanks Lord for putting me in this Transportation Department, a place that I couldn’t imagine before. I got new friends, learnt a lot of new things. I knew it still long tiring journey to be done, but it’s good for my faith, to prove to whom I rely on…I thank Thee my Jesus for Your guidance, for the inner healing, for my families and friends that supported me when I was weak, for the times we’re together Lord. I want to give my best for You, neither by my might nor by my own power but…by You Holly Spirit.

He starts the good things
He will finish them to the end
With Jesus, we can do anything.
Amen.

composed by: Riena M Kusuma N, SH

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God is my Shepherd and my Hope (part 2)

The college ages should be the exciting times for youngster, times to express theirself, times to prepare their future. I should do it as well, keeping what God’s given to me, but…I let myself destroy it!

It began with my over protected father about man and woman relationship. He didn’t agree about my relationship with Bayu, my first love. In about 6 years long we had our relationship, but my father never opens his heart. He didn’t want us to get along…it hurt me, made me to resist anything he wants…

Until in 1998 I met someone who wanted to get along with me, but in destructive way. Since I was with Yudha, my life was a mess; I started to tell a lie to my parents, neglecting my college, and forgot about my faith to the Lord. Days by days, my life went to the darkness, it was about going to crashed!

My mother realized about the changing of my lives, she saw that I was different, I was not me anymore…I was not her beloved daughter she was given birth.
I didn’t know what was happened to me, felt empty…I just live on my own life.
One day, she asked me to attend in the retreat services in my church, it changed my lives. In the retreat, my mother put her hands on me, cried and prayed…I didn’t know what the prayer was about, but I felt something happened inside me. Many voices…powers tried to drag me in their side. Since that moment, I encountered many experiences.

I met Bayu again one time…I felt terrible and I didn’t know why, I started to hate Yudha and wanted to leave him. I knew I chose the wrong path, but I had to go back…
We’re in a bad argument when I said about my decision to leave him. He didn’t want to leave me, and swore that my lives would be terrible without him; I would never be succeeding without him…even in getting a job.

But I made up my mind, I was not afraid about the curses.
I knew that My Lord has forgiven me; I have powerful Lord who owns my life. There’s nothing can touch me, He will protects me and gives me a way out…my future is on His hands. I heard from my friend in college that Yudha used the darkness power to get along with me. He tried harder to get me back to be his lover. Many paranormals were hired to grab me; they worked in the same time and from every side.
Thanks God, it didn’t work on me. I called His name again and again…every minute…seconds I surrendered my lives to Him. Amazingly, the paranormal later on said that there’s a ring protection covered me, and could not be broken. Hallelujah…the power inside me is stronger than any spirits…

Almost four years long he tried. Many times when I was asleep, the demons tried to drag me down. I saw myself inside the darkness and they pulled me in…it’s hurt, I was just screaming calling to my Jesus. He did help me out; in Jesus name I’d been saved. Thanks God, since I was away from Yudha, I felt alive again and even I could finish my college in about 4 years and 3 months. Wonderfully, I got good marks as well.

I really realized God’s hands on me. When I worked on my thesis, from my Mentor Mrs. Yuli, she introduced me with someone who later on taught me to finish my thesis. It took only 1 month to finish it. When the thesis test come, He gave wisdom…I could answer all of the questions. Many students said that the test was so tense and very difficult, but amazingly…it’s easy for me. It’s so relax and enjoying. Praise the Lord!
Great thanks to my families that always stand by my side, lift up their prayers for me. Thanks to Mr. Agustinus Yudi, SH for your helps, a friend who always willing to teach me on my thesis, thanks to Mrs. Sri Wahyuningsih Yulianti, SH; Mr. Edi Herdyanto, SH and Mrs. Lusiana Marianingsih, SH; for all of your support…but above all, thank you my Jesus Lord!


THE BEST COULD BE ACHIEVED IF WE KEEP ON SETTING OUR EYES TO THE FUTURE WITHOUT NEGLECTING THE PAST AND ALWAYS GRATEFUL FOR THE PRESENT!
by PS.JOSE CAROL




composed by: Riena M Kusuma N, SH

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God is my Shepherd and my Hope (part 1)

I was in the 3rd grade senior high school 1996-1997 when this miracle happened. It’s the time I had to make up my mind where I had to study in college. We’re struggling for this one. I’m from a modest family, my father is a civil servant and my mother is only a housewife. If I had to take the private college, we wouldn’t have the money to pay. We lifted prayers…prayers…and surrendered to Him. If college is one of Your plans, there’s nothing impossible to You Lord!
One time, some civil universities announced their special lane to be the students – PMDK. The terms based on the 1st – 3rd grade achievement on the senior high school. So I sent my application to Sebelas Maret University (UNS) Solo in the law faculty. Major lessons that bored me actually, but I didn’t know why…something whispered to my heart that it’s the right one to take…UNS in law faculty.

The day was come, many universities had announced who passed the terms to be their students, but strange…UNS didn’t announce the result yet. It’s pounding my heart! Many friends had the celebration, they’re very happy but…I was still in doubt, could I get the same opportunity, could I learn in the civil university? Fear, doubt, nervous…could I get the same chance? But they took the same faculty as well…Lord, was it your plan for me to continue my study? You knew my family’s economy. In this confusion time…I put my hope in You, all things are possible for You…
Times went by…suddenly my teacher called me, she congratulated me…I passed the terms with the maximum result! I didn’t know that UNS had sent the announcement to my school. Wow…amazing!
When men can not bare their burdens, He gives strenght to help them out...miraculously I could continue my study in UNS, without any test! Indeed, it’s a hugh gift that God gave to my lives...
Thanks GOD !!! YOU ARE REALLY GOOD...!!


composed by: Riena M Kusuma N, SH

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It's me...Riena K

I was born in a modest family in a small city right on the valley of Mount Lawu, Karanganyar Solo, a small city in Central Java Indonesia. It’s a nice, comfortable, cool and peacefully place to live on. I’m the oldest children of 3, Nanda my younger brother and Resty is the youngest sister. But in 1988, God called Nanda home when he was 7, in a water-accident. It’s so hard to us, but we surrendered to Him, we believe He has perfect plans for us…even though days without Nanda.

Many things had happened to my lives. I knew He always with me in every step from the tiniest to the biggest experiences I encountered. Drizzle to stormy rains came and often led me to the dead ends. No hope…almost gave up, its grabbed me away from His part…
But He is good all the times, He always takes me back and guides through the things I can not pass through, He reminds me to have hopes and rely on His help.

GOD'S DELAYS ARE NOT GOD'S DENIALS
GOD'S TIMING IS PERFECT
PATIENCE IS WHAT WE NEED IN PRAYER

These words strengthen me to walk with God every day, learn that He has power to do anything to my lives, I give up to Him…and surrender my life.

One time when I was weak, I vowed that… if You give me job for living, I’ll tell to the world what You’ve done through out my lives, whenever and wherever it is…let the world knows that You’re truly amazing God! And thanks God, unintentionally I met someone who reminds me to fulfill my vow, just after I got the job! He asked me to contribute on this blog. Wow…it’s the perfect time! Thanks to Mr. Stefanus Fajar Nugraha for this chance. GOD BLESSES YOU!!

composed by: Riena M Kusuma N, SH

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God’s helping hands

It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.
(Antoine de Saint-Exupery, The Little Prince)


“God, I’m longing for a soulmate…I had a job, I’m mature enough to have one, please God…” John was asking to God when He was in Manado North Sulawesi (Celebes). He was about 30 years old and had a job in Multi National Contractor Company and had assigned to handle the business in there. He met lots of beautiful natives, but none were ideal to get along with. Many days left, many prayers had lifted up but there’s no sign…

“Go home…you’ll find your wife there, my grandson” Grandma…! I was dreaming, God…is it Your answer? He dreamt his beloved passed away-grandma with white gown come and asked him to go home…someone was waiting for him. His grandma was very close to him but already passed away many years before he got a job. So God, it’s Your answer to my prayers…then he wrote a letter to his sister to find a wife for him, but he didn’t tell anyone about the dream. Miraculously, God opened the way for him to go home. John was called to go back to head office Jakarta. Then John prepared his reports and also hundred blank-wedding invitation cards with him to bring home to Solo, but…he still didn’t know about his would be wife…and the challenges were just begun!

Many incidents hampered his traveled home. The small Dakota airplane was broke down in Ujung Pandang South Sulawesi when he was in the way home to Jakarta from Manado. He had to take another airplane, but God was good when he started questioning again the prayer answer. He met a nice co-pilot who encouraged him about the plan, so he made his mind up. God had made a decision, God made the way… After turned in his reports to head office in Jakarta, he asked permission to go home Solo to see a girl whom would be his wife. Then he took a train to Solo, but again…the incident happened. The train jumped the rails in Secang, urged him to take a bus in the midst of the freezing night. The time was around two o’clock in the morning.

After two days rested, he then with his father went to Griyan Solo to meet a girl, whom his sister told him about. The girl Maria was an elementary teacher. John just got less than a week to know Maria before he had to go back to Jakarta for another duty. So after the meeting, they got in touched to know each other. In the first time, Maria didn’t accept his propose after knowing each other for a while. But John didn’t give up. He kept contact to Maria whilst he was in Jakarta. Prayers and prayers were lifted up to know what God’s plan…but no answer.

Before he was assigned back to Manado, he went back again to Solo and tried to propose Maria.

“It was an amazing time…God was good, He made miracle! He softened Maria’s heart” John said. Maria’s father agreed about the plan and so did her. John and Maria agreed to get married a week after for preparing the reception and her job transferred to Manado. “It took five weeks to know and marry her” John reminisced about his struggle to have a wife. So after he came back to Jakarta, John brought Maria to Manado. A year later, they went to Papua for another assignment. In this island, they were blessed with 6 children. After about eight years in there, they went back to Solo to raise the children.

God works in His way we can not see. He decides, He provides the way to fulfill His plans.

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Power of prayer

When situations work out, we often assume it’s a coincidence or the result of our own efforts. And sometimes it is. But answers also come because we pray.

Rangga and Reva were a couple. They were together in about four five years when this story - almost got them bad injured - happened. They were students in Jogjakarta, and stayed in boarding house. But because of they lived in Solo, 65km away from their college, they had to go home on Saturday and went back to Jogjakarta on Sunday afternoon or sometimes Monday morning…by motorbike.

It was in March, a rainy season for tropical country Indonesia. The weather sometimes unpredictable, one time it had hard rain but sometime it’s so hot. And as usual, they planned to go home on Saturday afternoon, but this time it’s different…

Reva was an active girl and joined groups, the Christian fellowship in her campus and also member of college’s choir. Rangga, he also an activist in his previous college’s Christian fellowship. In this week Reva got a heavy task load, so she had to finish them all before could go home on Saturday to see her family in Solo.

In this Saturday, the heavy rain covered Jogjakarta since morning until afternoon. The air was so humid and freeze, sometimes the fog covered the road. The time was about six in the evening when the rain stopped. The night was still young, but going home by motorbike in the evening was risky. The traffic Jogjakarta – Solo was always busy in the morning and evening, and in fact the road was under construction in that time. But they had to go home anyway…before they went on a ride, as usual; they lift a prayer for the protection whilst they’re on the road. Wearing jackets, helmets and shocks with sandals for the protection of freeze night, they started to ride home.

They were riding together, slowly…sometimes they sang to kill the time. For 65km far, usually it takes about 2 hours top by motorbike. The street was slippery and dangerous because of rain and under construction. Many bikers went home as well at that night and the traffic was busy. After they reach Prambanan, 30 km away from Jogjakarta, suddenly they slipped on a pile of sands before they fell in a whole…It was not seen before and dark in surrounds. The whole was about one meter square and fifteen centimeters depth; there was no sign about it.

“Are you okay honey?” Rangga asked Reva. “Yeah…I’m…I’m okay” she replied shaken. It’s very dangerous; the street was under construction but no sign for this big whole? Luckily, there were no other vehicles close to them when the incident happened. “Thanks God, we are okay…it just tore my blue jeans off” thanked Rangga to God for their safety. Then they ride home safely after the incident.


Another incident almost got them badly. It was the time when they went back to Jogjakarta after the weekend in Solo. Often, they went back on Sunday afternoon. But they were tired after doing their activity a whole day, so they plan to go in the next early morning.

Rangga picked up Reva around four fifteen in the morning. The dawn was not broken yet and it’s chilled after the rain a whole night before. “God please protects us, we need Your guardian Angel to lead us on the way” they prayed before they started the ride. With complete safety equipment, jackets, helmets and even shoes they went to ride. The road was not busy, but it’s so dark because they took the shortcut way than usual…and they both still sleepy!

“What happened?” Reva shouted at Rangga’s back after he shocked-turned the motorbike. “I almost hit the tractor behind us” he replied after they passed a huge field tractor. “Did you hear its roaring machine?” they both didn’t hear anything until only one meter ahead from the tractor’s tail. Feuh…almost! How can we don’t hear any sound? God, thanks for Your helping hands.


God will come on the right time…on the right place…on the right moment. He owns the time and the universe.

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Faith won’t fail…

Faith is the hand to take the miracles to the earth!

John was with Thomas in that morning in their rent house in Pugeran Jogjakarta. It was about 10 o’clock in the morning, May 23rd 1999. His other sons, Jacob, Moses and Steve were in the campus not far from the house. John just finished his morning prayer as usual. He sat on the sofa having a little talk to Thomas with a cigarette on his hand. The ashtray was full of butts.
Suddenly, Thomas started to cough hardly and stop breathing. His body was stiff and got convulsive movement. He fell down and fainted on the floor…with hardly breathe! John who sat close to him, strangely not began to be panic. He just knelt down and started to pray for Thomas’ healing. First minute nothing happened...third…fifth…Thomas still fainted with short-winded. John kept praying...praying…and praying. It was so silence moment, only heard the sounds of John’s prayer and his son’s hardly breathe. John kept his faith up…my son must be healed!

“Thomas, wake up…wake up!” cried John. He shook Thomas’ body many times. Then…Thomas opened his eyes…”What happened?” he asked confusedly. “Come on, lets start to give thanks to the Lord…you were losing your breath and almost die!” John explained to him.

Thomas and John will never forget the time God had made the miracle to their lives…


This faith’s hand also brought miracle to Maria, John’s wife.

Someday, Maria had a very bad toothache. She couldn’t eat, talked nor even did her routine activities. She started screaming…cried…she just lied down on the bed. She did take pain killers pill, but nothing happened. She cried…cried loudly worried her families. Steve, her youngest son then asked John to pray together for the healing. “We have faith and Words to be confessed to heal mom!” he urged John. Then they both circling Maria and started to pray. “With His stripes, you’d healed, in the name of Jesus!” then something did happened….Maria stopped crying…and they thanked God for the healing.


Faith won’t loosen its hand to bring miracles if we just believe!

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