Re: upsize where it matters

Ever wish for a mighty manhood so strong that you can take on all the women in the world?

http://www.welltuck.com/

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God is my Shepherd and my Hope (part 3)

In my prayers, I asked the best job from God, working in Jakarta…stay in a brand new location started the new life, away from my passed darkness.
Many tests I experienced, but none gave good result…even though until the last step, still zero…They gave many reasons, from the look and physical that’s not matched with what they asked for…gosh…how can they judge a book by its cover, didn’t they already read my CV? Often they said, they were looking for the experienced graduate law faculty student…how could I have experience if they don’t give me chances? And if there’re a company hired me, they could not give balance in return…overtimes because of the work loads with limited times…it ate me much, I could not stand anymore! It’s heavy struggling for me, tested my faith…how big I trusted and relied my hope on Him, because like or not, I still remembered Yudha’s cursed on me…

In the 5th year after my graduation, I felt emptiness. I could not think straight anymore. I could not give the best to my parents as the oldest children, I was afraid to burden them forever, I felt nothing…I was exhausted…God what do you want from me? Please tell me…I don’t want to make another mistake anymore, don’t let my pass hold me back to walk ahead with You. I give up my future to You, I want to fulfill Your will for me…please don’t let this burden drags me away from Your sight, give me strength Lord…

In early 2006, God had answered my prayers. I got information that the Transportation Department needed for civil servants 2005 formation. But I was afraid, could I pass this time? I didn’t study for a long time, many good competitors would be there, it downed me…
Fortunately My parents, my whole families gave their support…so I made up my mind and sent my application, with my Law degree background and Crime Law majority.

When the 1st step result being announced, the level for whoever passed the administration terms, I urged to check my name on the Transportation Department website. On the Crime Law field, I checked them out one by one started with R as my alphabetical name, but nothing...I rechecked again slower, but still none! Reluctantly, I rechecked names by names started with A through Z, but still my name was not there!

Upsad, felt useless...but before I clicked the log out button, a calm voice whispered to my heart...why don’t you read one by one, field by field? Hey, why not...nothing to loose right? I can check also if my friends pass this administration terms. Suddenly, I saw a home address written. Huh...? Isn’t it my address...how...how it can be? And this is my name next to it! Praise Lord! It’s really astonishing, my name written in the Civil Law formation...but didn’t I apply for the Crime Law?

Weeks later, the time for the test came. I surrendered all to the Lord...and I set my mind up then went to Jakarta. But, a few hours before the test, something bothered me...shocked me badly! Lord, what is this? I just came back to You, but this one wants to hold me back! I can not believe this, he spoke like that to me...we’re so close, same feeling...how could he? But why now? Why not in the past few years ago when I left him for Yudha? Why now when I’m going to take the test tomorrow...it’s hurt...grudge and hatred...I won’t forgive him, ever! I cried...cried..confused...I didn’t know what to do...are there any chances for me to stand on my own feet? Am I not deserve happiness? It blew me down! I just wanted to go home, gave up...but if I gave up, I’d fail! Thanks God, He sent His son – thanks Mr. Anton – you cooled me down “Forgiving is not merely about feeling nor dignity, but decision. Can we love him just like Jesus does to us? Remind this, there is always beautiful rainbow after the rain and storm stop” and prayed for me…In the morning, I took the test…I relied on Him for all the process although as human being it’s not easy, could I pass these all? But I just looked up to the Lord…

Numbers by numbers of the tests went by…but every time this hatred came, I called Him. Lord was so good, He gave me wisdom to finish the tests that I’d never been learnt before, and I didn’t know at all about the transportation things. Even, so far when I did the logical test I took a lot of time to finish it, but this time…it’s so quick! I knew it’s because of Him…
But it didn’t stop yet; weeks later I got called to do the 3rd test, the psychological test and interview. Worries attacked me…could I do these tests? I don’t know all about transportation field and the Civil Law is not my majority. Minutes before the tests, I was so nervous. There’s somebody else, a Christian as well, would do the tests after me. We had discussion about the tests, and we played what if question. If the question like this then the answer should be like this…My turn for the test came. In the room, there’re three people inside. Two persons were the High Rank from the department, and the other one was the Psychologist. Again, miracle happened! The questions were just like the what if questions! All the questions were answered, and the tests were so relax, so enjoying. What a marvelous Lord! I realized then that He sent someone to prepare the answers by playing the what if questions. My family and I gave the result to God, let His will be done. If this one is Your plan, there’s nothing impossible for You Lord. And whatever the result would be, I still thank Thee. I’m holding on Your promises…my future is in Your hands.

Praise the Lord! Hallelujah…He answered our prayers. I was in! He put me in this job! But what happened to my competitor friend? She had a capability more than me and a lot of experiences that fits to this job. Thanks friend, for what you’d done for me…Thanks Lord for putting me in this Transportation Department, a place that I couldn’t imagine before. I got new friends, learnt a lot of new things. I knew it still long tiring journey to be done, but it’s good for my faith, to prove to whom I rely on…I thank Thee my Jesus for Your guidance, for the inner healing, for my families and friends that supported me when I was weak, for the times we’re together Lord. I want to give my best for You, neither by my might nor by my own power but…by You Holly Spirit.

He starts the good things
He will finish them to the end
With Jesus, we can do anything.
Amen.

composed by: Riena M Kusuma N, SH

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God is my Shepherd and my Hope (part 2)

The college ages should be the exciting times for youngster, times to express theirself, times to prepare their future. I should do it as well, keeping what God’s given to me, but…I let myself destroy it!

It began with my over protected father about man and woman relationship. He didn’t agree about my relationship with Bayu, my first love. In about 6 years long we had our relationship, but my father never opens his heart. He didn’t want us to get along…it hurt me, made me to resist anything he wants…

Until in 1998 I met someone who wanted to get along with me, but in destructive way. Since I was with Yudha, my life was a mess; I started to tell a lie to my parents, neglecting my college, and forgot about my faith to the Lord. Days by days, my life went to the darkness, it was about going to crashed!

My mother realized about the changing of my lives, she saw that I was different, I was not me anymore…I was not her beloved daughter she was given birth.
I didn’t know what was happened to me, felt empty…I just live on my own life.
One day, she asked me to attend in the retreat services in my church, it changed my lives. In the retreat, my mother put her hands on me, cried and prayed…I didn’t know what the prayer was about, but I felt something happened inside me. Many voices…powers tried to drag me in their side. Since that moment, I encountered many experiences.

I met Bayu again one time…I felt terrible and I didn’t know why, I started to hate Yudha and wanted to leave him. I knew I chose the wrong path, but I had to go back…
We’re in a bad argument when I said about my decision to leave him. He didn’t want to leave me, and swore that my lives would be terrible without him; I would never be succeeding without him…even in getting a job.

But I made up my mind, I was not afraid about the curses.
I knew that My Lord has forgiven me; I have powerful Lord who owns my life. There’s nothing can touch me, He will protects me and gives me a way out…my future is on His hands. I heard from my friend in college that Yudha used the darkness power to get along with me. He tried harder to get me back to be his lover. Many paranormals were hired to grab me; they worked in the same time and from every side.
Thanks God, it didn’t work on me. I called His name again and again…every minute…seconds I surrendered my lives to Him. Amazingly, the paranormal later on said that there’s a ring protection covered me, and could not be broken. Hallelujah…the power inside me is stronger than any spirits…

Almost four years long he tried. Many times when I was asleep, the demons tried to drag me down. I saw myself inside the darkness and they pulled me in…it’s hurt, I was just screaming calling to my Jesus. He did help me out; in Jesus name I’d been saved. Thanks God, since I was away from Yudha, I felt alive again and even I could finish my college in about 4 years and 3 months. Wonderfully, I got good marks as well.

I really realized God’s hands on me. When I worked on my thesis, from my Mentor Mrs. Yuli, she introduced me with someone who later on taught me to finish my thesis. It took only 1 month to finish it. When the thesis test come, He gave wisdom…I could answer all of the questions. Many students said that the test was so tense and very difficult, but amazingly…it’s easy for me. It’s so relax and enjoying. Praise the Lord!
Great thanks to my families that always stand by my side, lift up their prayers for me. Thanks to Mr. Agustinus Yudi, SH for your helps, a friend who always willing to teach me on my thesis, thanks to Mrs. Sri Wahyuningsih Yulianti, SH; Mr. Edi Herdyanto, SH and Mrs. Lusiana Marianingsih, SH; for all of your support…but above all, thank you my Jesus Lord!


THE BEST COULD BE ACHIEVED IF WE KEEP ON SETTING OUR EYES TO THE FUTURE WITHOUT NEGLECTING THE PAST AND ALWAYS GRATEFUL FOR THE PRESENT!
by PS.JOSE CAROL




composed by: Riena M Kusuma N, SH

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God is my Shepherd and my Hope (part 1)

I was in the 3rd grade senior high school 1996-1997 when this miracle happened. It’s the time I had to make up my mind where I had to study in college. We’re struggling for this one. I’m from a modest family, my father is a civil servant and my mother is only a housewife. If I had to take the private college, we wouldn’t have the money to pay. We lifted prayers…prayers…and surrendered to Him. If college is one of Your plans, there’s nothing impossible to You Lord!
One time, some civil universities announced their special lane to be the students – PMDK. The terms based on the 1st – 3rd grade achievement on the senior high school. So I sent my application to Sebelas Maret University (UNS) Solo in the law faculty. Major lessons that bored me actually, but I didn’t know why…something whispered to my heart that it’s the right one to take…UNS in law faculty.

The day was come, many universities had announced who passed the terms to be their students, but strange…UNS didn’t announce the result yet. It’s pounding my heart! Many friends had the celebration, they’re very happy but…I was still in doubt, could I get the same opportunity, could I learn in the civil university? Fear, doubt, nervous…could I get the same chance? But they took the same faculty as well…Lord, was it your plan for me to continue my study? You knew my family’s economy. In this confusion time…I put my hope in You, all things are possible for You…
Times went by…suddenly my teacher called me, she congratulated me…I passed the terms with the maximum result! I didn’t know that UNS had sent the announcement to my school. Wow…amazing!
When men can not bare their burdens, He gives strenght to help them out...miraculously I could continue my study in UNS, without any test! Indeed, it’s a hugh gift that God gave to my lives...
Thanks GOD !!! YOU ARE REALLY GOOD...!!


composed by: Riena M Kusuma N, SH

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It's me...Riena K

I was born in a modest family in a small city right on the valley of Mount Lawu, Karanganyar Solo, a small city in Central Java Indonesia. It’s a nice, comfortable, cool and peacefully place to live on. I’m the oldest children of 3, Nanda my younger brother and Resty is the youngest sister. But in 1988, God called Nanda home when he was 7, in a water-accident. It’s so hard to us, but we surrendered to Him, we believe He has perfect plans for us…even though days without Nanda.

Many things had happened to my lives. I knew He always with me in every step from the tiniest to the biggest experiences I encountered. Drizzle to stormy rains came and often led me to the dead ends. No hope…almost gave up, its grabbed me away from His part…
But He is good all the times, He always takes me back and guides through the things I can not pass through, He reminds me to have hopes and rely on His help.

GOD'S DELAYS ARE NOT GOD'S DENIALS
GOD'S TIMING IS PERFECT
PATIENCE IS WHAT WE NEED IN PRAYER

These words strengthen me to walk with God every day, learn that He has power to do anything to my lives, I give up to Him…and surrender my life.

One time when I was weak, I vowed that… if You give me job for living, I’ll tell to the world what You’ve done through out my lives, whenever and wherever it is…let the world knows that You’re truly amazing God! And thanks God, unintentionally I met someone who reminds me to fulfill my vow, just after I got the job! He asked me to contribute on this blog. Wow…it’s the perfect time! Thanks to Mr. Stefanus Fajar Nugraha for this chance. GOD BLESSES YOU!!

composed by: Riena M Kusuma N, SH

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